In modern America there is a word which is used but not known.  We know it is good.  We know it should be established, acknowledged, and esteemed, but at best we pay lip service to an amazing virtue found in Scripture.  The word is honor.  What is honor?  The Bible commands us to honor many things – God, governing authorities, and our parents to name a few.  We are to pursue the ways of honor and act honorably.  But what does that mean?

In today’s world we have a hard time differentiating between the pride of man and honor.  Pride exists in the hearts of men, but many times, the nobleness of honor is mistaken for pride.  How can we separate these things?  How can we know which is which?  If a good man refuses to ask for help, is it because he is honorable and not wanting to disrupt others for personal gain?  Or is he being too prideful to ask for help?

There used to be a grasp of this idea embedded in our nation’s founding.  People would kill one another in duels for the sake of honor; if a family member was insulted, in many instances, a duel ensued.  Many of our founding fathers in this great nation were involved in duels.  Alexander Hamilton was killed in a duel. Andrew Jackson was shot in the chest at point blank range before shooting and killing his adversary. In the wild west, if you called someone a liar or a cheat you were taking your life into your own hands.  There are countless examples of duels in this country that were held on account of “honor.” There is no doubt that some of these were an excessive use of violence justifying ungodly ways.  But there is also something noble about being held accountable for the words of one’s mouth. In many ways this was no different than the days of King David and his mighty men, many of whom killed for the sake of honor.  David was moved to kill Goliath because the Philistine monster was dishonoring the God of the Israelites. Jesus flipped over the tables in the temple because the merchants were dishonoring the house of His father! When Phineas the son of Eleazar drove his spear through the Israelite man and the Midianite woman it was because he was zealous for the honor of God. Do you remember what happened after that? God made a covenant with Phineas. 

I am not advocating for the reinstatement of duels and spear thrusting for every insult we receive.  What I am saying is that modern Americans are not declining to duel or shoot people who act dishonorably because they have a biblical conviction to “turn the other cheek”. Instead, we feign piety, but our hearts tremble with fear or rage, or even worse, they are filled with apathy. For the most part, our inaction is not because people are slow to anger and patient through affliction, but rather because our hearts are filled with cowardice and indifference. What has happened in our country, our churches, and our families, is that we have forgotten honor.  We mask our fear and our ignorance of honor by giving lip service to other biblical concepts: being slow to anger, turning the other cheek, or loving our enemies. The truth is, we haven’t truly spent time forgiving our enemies because we go home to gossip, complain and whine about them. Perhaps we don’t care what they said about our mamas, because we ourselves don’t truly honor or care about them.  How can we expect others to honor our parents if we do not honor them? 

If you want to know what a culture that has forgotten honor looks like, our culture today is ripe with examples.  Why do able bodied people have no problem begging on street corners? They have forgotten honor.  Why do people have no problem shirking parental responsibilities? They have no honor. Why are some people able to unashamedly ask for favor after favor after favor?  Why do seemingly good people stand by while evil seems to advance all around them?  Why do people have absolutely no problem collecting welfare checks or even applying for unemployment?  Why do young kids not mind sitting in the comfortable spots while the old stand? Why do people have no problem yelling and profaning the very people that brought them into this world? It is because they do not grasp any concept of honor.  Are all of these issues black and white?  Maybe not, there can always be individual circumstances that allow us to offer grace.  But, as a culture, we have forgotten this beautiful concept of honor and it has allowed us to lead shameless lives, when perhaps a little shame would bring us nearer to the mercy seat of Christ. 

So how do we bring back this virtue into our homes and communities again? Repenting and humbling ourselves is a good start.  There is never shame in admitting we were wrong and changing.  One could fill many books with ways to do this. Perhaps the most practical way to do this is to read the Proverbs. Dive into them and strive to live a proverbial life. Honor is tied to nearly every theme in the book.   Secondly, one of the simplest things we can do to regain honor is to earnestly let our yes be yes, and our no be no.  Almost no other thing has deteriorated honor in our society like the constant mind changing, backing out of things, breaking our words, and constant excuses that come out of our pathetic, whimpering mouths.  If you say you are going to do something, then do it!    Perhaps the most important step to rediscovering honor is to live the secret life that Christ spoke of – living a holy life for our God and Father rather than for praise in the world of men. The life and ministry of our Lord Jesus Christ is the epitome of honor and if we need an example of how to do this, that’s where we look.

How can a man lead his own home if he has no honor?  If his wife and children run all over him, how can he teach them the things of God and how can he fight the injustices of the world around him? He won’t because he can’t.  Once we begin to bring honor and integrity back into our lives, (and yes we are actually completely dependent on God to accomplish this) then maybe we can learn what it means to honor those who are in authority over us, whether it be our bosses, pastors, governing officials, parents, spouses, or anyone else God places in that position.

One thing that must accompany this challenge to live with honor is a warning against pride.  When people strive to be honorable, and begin to act honorably, it becomes difficult to live in a world where no one else seems to acknowledge honor.  Judgement and pride can well up in the hearts of honorable men and destroy much good. Be wary that your quest to serve God through living an honorable life does not lead you to the pitfall of pride.